God: Child, are you not pleased with your assignment?

Me: God, I love working with you and hearing your voice. I would not ever want to change that. But, the assignment feels like a heavy burden. Not because of your expectations but because the truth that you want carried is rarely met with acceptance. It feels like I’m at odds continually with the people that you send me to.

God: Child, they are not rejecting you. They are rejecting me. It’s me that they refuse to seek. It’s me that they refuse to listen to. You have their attention, and you are always reminding them to seek me with priority. Beloved, I am your encourager. You don’t need their approval. I love you and am with you always. I will not leave you or abandon you.

Me: God, it doesn’t seem like they are making any progress against their false doctrines. It’s been a lot of work on my part and it doesn’t seem to be making a difference. How much of my life must be sacrificed to reach the stubborn pastors for them to change?

God: Child, you have done my will completely. You are not responsible for the outcome. I am. I will affect the change needed in one way or another. Just keep doing your job with expectation of my righteous justice. But, you should know child, that you have made a difference. You’re too close to the subject to see clearly the changes that are happening.

Me: Will you tell me who has improved and who has shut me out?

God: Child, not one of the pastors that I have assigned you to oversee have shut you out. Each one of them is watching closely to see what you are writing. They respect you for your wholehearted pursuit of truth and for sharing it so willingly. Not one of them has sacrificed more or worked harder to communicate my will. Please Jasmine, don’t carry this as a burden but as a high honor. You hear my voice in a way that they could only hope to know. Their improvement may be slow, but it is happening in very subtle ways.

Me: Lord, I don’t want to complain about the assignment. I want to be wholeheartedly devoted to your will. But it hurts to constantly be pushed away and rejected.

God: Jasmine, you are not being rejected. They are jealous and greedy for power. You, my beloved, are everything that they hope to be. You are gifted in every way. You have courage that they admire. You have strength against persecution. You are beautiful while they have ugliness that needs to be dealt with. I love you Jasmine. Don’t focus on their hateful ways. Focus on me.

Me: Thank you God. You always make me feel better. I needed that peace that only you can afford.

Note: The Lord gave me a new name at the beginning of this journey together. The name Jasmine is pronounced Yaz-meen when He says it. He rarely ever calls me Tammie.